The World Through Sober Eyes

If there’s one thing that sobriety has taught me, it’s how different the world looks through sober eyes. Often when people are drunk they think they’re the life of the party, the star of their own show. I know I used to “come alive” when I was drinking and couldn’t imagine how anyone could be having a good time without a drink in their hand. Boy, was I ever wrong.

I’d attended a conference a few years ago, and there was a British speaker that I found to be quite captivating. He had a legendary resume, dealt with issues on a global stage, was well-spoken and overall seemed like a pretty cool guy. That night I met him and some other colleagues at a local pub, and the drinks started flowing (I was indulging in my usual diet soda). Before long this gentleman that I’d taken a liking to started revealing a very different side. He was loud, obnoxious and handsy with the waitress causing her visible discomfort. He got to the point of being cut-off by the bartender, which really came as no surprise.

The next morning as I sat in the lobby waiting to check-out, he emerged from the elevator looking a lot less like the business professional I was first introduced to. Suddenly I was seeing him as a party boy more than a respected colleague. Now don’t get me wrong; I still liked the guy and all. And I wasn’t sitting there judging his life based on that one occasion. But my impression inevitably shifted. Things really did look different through sober eyes.

On another occasion, I met a friend at a lounge that I used to frequent when I drank. This one particular time was early in the evening and we were sitting at our usual table. Around the bar there was a group of three or four guys drinking away and having a good time. They were doing shots and luring the server in to join them. Then one of the guys stood on the bar stool and started waving his arms in the air and laughing like a school boy that just got his friend with a whoopee cushion prank.

I’ll never forget watching the waitress laugh awkwardly in hope that the situation would quickly pass. Although she didn’t appear angry, it was obvious she was not impressed by this feeble display of bravado. I hate to assume that she was used to behaviour like this, though I’m sure she has experienced her share of needless drunken antics.

What struck a chord with me, despite not having attempted this ridiculous stunt – was the perception we have of ourselves when drunk. We think we’re the center of the universe, the envy of the crowd and that we can do no wrong. I can safely tell you with all the confidence in the world, this is not the case. As I panned the bar during this one man showcase, I did not see any thumbs up or hear any shouts of encouragement. Nor did the rest of the patrons follow suit after being mesmerized by this individual’s display of leadership. Again, seeing this through sober eyes gave me a new perspective on my old ways.

Now that I’m enjoying a sober lifestyle, the world looks a lot different to me through sober eyes. I’m literally seeing more of it as I travel more frequently, and I have a greater appreciation for life. I no longer feel like I am wasting time living in an endless cycle of addiction but rather enjoying the simple pleasures life has to offer. Don’t get me wrong, I still get frustrated, annoyed, hurt and all the other emotions everyone experiences. The difference is I now feel like I am able to handle them all with greater ease. I often think if I can survive addiction I can deal with anything.

I feel eternally grateful that I have what I’d almost consider a second chance at life. If I’d have kept up at my old pace, it wouldn’t surprise me not to be here today. It’s also a big part of my motivation to share my experiences with other people, in hopes of showing those struggling with addiction that there is a better life out there. And we deserve that better life. You too can see this amazing world through sober eyes. Let yourself live!